Four years ago....
I fell in love with my firstborn son
I came face-to-face with the answer to my prayers
I finally understood complete and utter unconditional love
I couldn't imagine ever being angry with the perfect little bundle laying in my arms
I had no idea how selfish I can be
I couldn't begin to understand the roller coaster I was about to ride, disguised as parenthood
I called one of my best friends and secretly confided that I could not stop kissing my newborn. She told me, "Of course you can't, silly!"
I had never experienced such awe, wonder, and bliss...or such sleep deprivation
I had no idea how many times I would think to myself "Ohhhh...NOW I get it!" and want to apologize to all the moms before me that I had silently judged.
I became the most biased parent on the planet, quite certain that God had given me the best little boy he had ever created. And then I slowly learned that, indeed, he is a sinner just like the rest of us. (Some days it's more obvious than others.)
I sang "God is so good" to my newborn son as I got him ready for church his first Sunday. And I'm still singing it to him as I tuck him in to bed every night.
I knew my baby was pretty special, but watching him with our subsequent babies only confirmed it. I thank God for giving us such a tender hearted son to begin our family. The way he loves and protects his sister and brother is truly amazing to me.
I didn't know that I would, very soon, see qualities of myself in this new little life. For better or worse, learned or inherited, this boy would mirror his mama. He gets so frustrated with inanimate objects. Why does he get so angry when his plastic animals won't stand up on their own? Well, mama, why do you get so frustrated when your washing machine spews water all over the garage floor? We're BOTH learning what it means to "Be angry, yet do not sin."
I couldn't even begin to grasp how much I would learn from my little boy. Earlier this week he told me, "Mom, tomorrow's a new day. I will choose to obey." His simple words of wisdom reach the deepest places in my heart.
I came to love this boy's daddy in a whole new way.
I could not even begin to image that, four years later, our blessing would be tripled.
Happy 4th Birthday, Ezekiel Sokyra Plumb! You are a dream come true. As we start this next leg of our journey together, I pray that I will have the wisdom, patience, and creativity to mold your heart and draw out the very best in you. I love you, Bear!
