Adding to the Fun...

Today I am 14 weeks pregnant. And I'm thanking God for this new little miracle growing inside me. Isn't motherhood the funniest thing? We can have the most challenging of days with our kids, feel pushed and tested, frustrated and discouraged, yet hearing the heartbeat of new life - another baby to add to the craziness - is the best sound in the entire world. Where is the rationale in that? How can we love so fiercly, so unconditionally, so recklessly? Yet I thank God that we do - and that we can recognize His children for exactly what they are...abundant blessings from Him. We are THRILLED to be expecting another baby. In some ways, I feel like it's my first all over again. Maybe it's because I had more of a break between Bekah Jane and this one and had longer to get the "baby bug." Or maybe because we weren't sure if we would be able to have another baby after our last misacrriage. Either way, I am all giddy and daydreamy about this baby...and absolutely cannot wait to hold that little newborn body. The kids have been so incredibly sweet about "their baby" so that just adds to the fun. I am honestly surprised by how much they "get it" and how often they refer to the baby. The other day Bekah Jane spontaneously pulled up my shirt and kissed my belly. And Ezekiel is always asking questions, "Mom, does the baby have two eys?" "Mom, can I see the baby now?" What a joy it is to share this experience with them!

We found out we were expecting a baby the day we moved into our new house. What a fun celebration that was - a new house, a new baby, and a new beginning after a whole lot of waiting. God's timing is rarely our own, but His plans are always so much better than what we conjure up.

February 24th - the day before I turn the big 3-0 - we should find out if we're having a boy or a girl! I CAN'T WAIT! The curiousity is killing me! And, honestly, I don't care either way. The best way I can put it is, I want both! So I'm bound to be happy with one or the other, right?

A word from Ezekiel

Quick story #1:

Ezekiel (Spontaneously throwing his arms around my neck): I love you mom!

Me: I love you too, bear. You are such a good boy.

Ezekiel: Yes. Exactly.


Quick Story #2:

Pulling up to the drive thru window last night, Kevan and I are talking when we hear Ezekiel saying, quite loudly, from his car seat:

UM, EXCUSE ME? Can I have a happy meal with chicken, hamburger, cheeseburger, and uhhhh...french fries?

We look back and he is turned toward the window trying to place his own order. Hahaha. Then he says "Dad, can you roll down my new car window please?"

So cute.

Things to remember...

Some of the cute stuff the kids are doing, that I don't want to forget!

• The last time we had rain, I found Bekah Jane out in our backyard. In just a diaper. Dancing on her tiptoes and twirling around with her hands in the air. Oh how I wish I had a picture, but I just stood there and stared at her instead, loving her ability to enjoy the simple things in life. Isn't that what we all should do in the rain?? I love that girl.
• Chris Rice's song "Come to Jesus" has been special to me since my grandparent's passed away. My cousin Andrea sang it at their service, and since then I've often sang it to the kids (thankfully they don't compare me to Andrea!). Anyway, Ezekiel seems to love it and has been asking for me to play the CD in the car. The other day he said "MOM, I NEED JESUS!" referring to his new favorite song. I couldn't help but laugh out loud. Especially when he turned to his sister and said "You too, baby? You want Jesus?" Then, to me, "Yeah, mom, WE NEED JESUS!" Yes you do, son.
• The other day Bekah Jane woke up from her nap a little grumpy. She was crying over a toy that was "broken" and Ezekiel came up and patted her back saying "What's wrong, baby? It's broken? Oh, I'm sorry. I forgive you." That kid can be super sweet - and super funny - when he wants to be!
• One Sunday Bekah Jane wore a tutu to church. After the service all the kids ran around the plaza area and played. My daughter, of course, went traipsing through the bushes. She emerged with a stick stuck to the back of her tutu. So hilarious watching her run in circles in her pretty little outfit with this stick dragging behind her! Again, the dichotomy that is my daughter!
• I am loving watching Ezekiel learn right now. The other day we were driving to my mom's and he was looking out the window. At a stop light, he points to a tree and says "Mom, is that a conifer?" I couldn't believe he remembered that word but I said "Yeah, I think so!" He confirmed by saying "Yep, it's has cones!" How cool is it to see your kids "get it"??
• In related news, Ezekiel is completely potty trained and I am so very proud. For a mama who was basically clueless about how to go about this, I am so glad it ended up being a fun experience! After our not-so-successful potty-training-in-a-day experiment, we eased up and sort of just let him use the potty when it was convenient or when he asked. Then, after we got settled into our new place and it was very obvious that he understood what he was supposed to do, we went to undies 100%. And he has done great! Very few accidents and dry all night long. Yippee!
• Last night I let Bekah snuggle with me in bed while we waited for daddy to get home. She fell asleep whispering "mama" and with her hands on my cheeks. So, so sweet.

That's all for now. Hoping you all enjoy this wonderfully rainy day!

Happy Birthday Bonus Baby!

Today my Bonus Baby turns 2 years old. "Bonus Baby" because she came so quickly after her big brother, and was my smoothest and easiest pregnancy. No extra blood work, no stat ultrasounds, no heightened concern about miscarriage. She was just added blessing, after we'd already been so abundantly blessed.

The day after Christmas 2007 I went in to talk to my doctor about what we should do about this "overdue" little girl. I was dilated to 5. The doctor was convinced that she should have been here already but, wanting a natural labor, I was hesitant to induce. We agreed that Dr. Fee would break my water the next morning, and hopefully we wouldn't have to introduce drugs to get contractions going. Much to my joy - and pain - contractions started coming hard and fast 20 minutes after my water broke. And less than 2 hours later I was holding my little girl in my arms. A beautiful beginning to a beautiful little life.

Rebekah Jane, you are a miracle to me. So much about you is a surprise and - two years later - I am still marveling at the mystery of YOU. How did you get such silky blond hair and sparkly blue eyes? How do already have such a passion for shoes and dollies? How can you be so perfectly girly and still eat dirt whenever you get the chance? And how I am I so blessed to have you as my porcelain-skinned, rose-bud lipped, snuggly, feisty, baby girl?

I am obsessed with your sweet smile, especially when you think no one is looking and you are simply content with whatever you're doing. I love all your new words, and how every sentence ends with a pause, and then "mama." "Nilk, please... mama." "Shoes on... mama." "Want dat too...mama." I love how you call Ezekiel "Brudder" and when we go out just me and you, you're always asking about "brudder." The other day we finished our grocery shopping and as we walked out of the store you said "See brudder?" knowing he was waiting for you at home.

I love how you want me to hold you - a lot - and how you bury your face in my neck almost as if you're pretending to be shy. And how you squeeze my neck tight and pat my back with your tiny hand. And even though it's challenging for me at times, I admire your spunk, baby girl. You are a complicated blend of sugary sweet and fiery spice. And sometimes I just don't know what I'm going to get. You can be throwing an all-out tantrum and I'll wonder how I'll ever reach your heart, when all of a sudden you'll listen to my voice, stop in your tracks, and say "Oh, sorry, mama" and move on to something else. Again, my mystery girl.

I don't know how much longer you will be "Baby", Bekah Jane. Daddy and I really hope God continues to bless us our family with more children. But you will always be our miraculous gift from the Lord, the baby we couldn't have wanted more, and the daughter we never imagined we'd be so blessed to have. We pray every day that you will grow to know and love Jesus. Doesn't that sum up everything we could want for you? Know and love Jesus, sweet girl, and you will find true joy in the life He grants you.

We love you with all all our hearts!

My cup runneth over.

The commotion of the day has passed, the kids are fast asleep, and the house is still...a great time to pause and jot down what I am truly thankful for right here, right now:

• Starting with the obvious: My wonderful new house. More specifically, the spa tub that I have enjoyed no less than 3 bubble baths in in the 5 days that we've lived here. And the walk-in pantry that makes me want to laugh out loud every time I open it, just because I love it so much. And the way I can see the kids playing in the yard from the kitchen, the dining room, my livingroom, and my bedroom. And the chair in my room that sits against a window with a rose bush climbing up it. I asked God to provide us with a house. I struggled with faith. I doubted. I feared. And then I learned to trust. And God gave us a home that surpasses my wildest dreams. I am in love with his provision, but even more in awe of the Provider. Seriously, God, a spa tub? And to think I was worried!
• My two beautiful and healthy babies. While this may seem obvious, I'll be honest: Some days I can't get over how amazing and perfect they are, and some days I think I must be crazy to want to have more! This season of mothering is HARD. It is super demanding and my kids are really high-maintenance. Not because they are necessarily "difficult", but just because they have constant needs. It is very taxing, and I am struggling more than ever to keep up with relationships, which has always been such a high priority for me. I wonder what it will be like when we add more kids to the family, and how much more difficult it may become to balance "life." But, here's the part I'm so thankful for: God continues to remind me (in so many amazing ways) of how badly I wanted to be a mama, and how much He has blessed me with these two little ones. Even on the hardest of days, I have moments of reflecting on how these two sweet faces are nothing less than answers to prayers. Abundant blessing from him. Presents that I do not deserve. They are not keeping me from doing what I should "really" be doing, they are my highest calling and my greatest gift from God. It doesn't hurt that they are so darn cute, too. =)

I think that's all I'm going to get to, for now. I am getting sleepy, but my heart is so full of thanks. So much to be grateful for!

Happy Halloween!

Some out-of-order pics of our very fun Denver Broncos Halloween celebration! We had a great night at the carnival, roasting hot dogs with grandma and papa and cousins, and then trick-or-treating in our new neighborhood! The kids were adorable tonight...such sweet family memories! PS: The first house we knocked at, Ezekiel ran inside! He thinks everyone wants to be his friend.

Rejoicing in the moment!

A few weeks ago, we were picking up our agent from his physical therapy appointment to go look at some houses in the area. As we pulled into the parking lot, Vic started waving Kevan down and gesturing to go park somewhere else. Without rolling down his window to ask questions, or even wondering out loud to me, Kevan backed out of the parking lot and found a spot across the street. There we sat while Vic stood in the parking lot and made no attempt to walk over to us. About a minute later, a fire truck came racing down the street and pulled into the parking lot - right where we had tried to park. It turned out Vic had just called 911 because a woman was having a heart attack, and he knew the paramedics would show up any minute.

I realized right then and there that I completely lack trust. I wanted to ask questions, I wanted to know why we couldn't park there. I wanted to know what the heck Vic was doing standing there instead of jumping in our car so we could go look at houses! But Kevan just did as he was told. He did not take control of the situation or stop to ask questions - he trusted that Vic had good reasons for doing what he was doing.

Oh, how this is a lesson I need to learn. From that day on I started to make a concerted effort to trust. Trust my husband (read: stop asking so many unnecessary questions!) but, more than that, trust the Lord. It sounds so simple, but it is so hard for me to do. I want to be in control.

Fast-forward a couple weeks. On Monday, we opened a little thing called ESCROW. And, yes, I am excited out of my skin. It feels SO GOOD to be in this place.

Just hours before we heard the good news, I had this really cool moment where I realized I felt complete trust. After months of doubt and questions, fear and anxiety, I finally surrendered. I relaxed in His arms, and gave up whatever control I never really had to begin with. I pictured the Lord picking out our neighborhood, knowing just the people whose lives we needed to influence, and who would pour into our lives as well. And I realized it is not about a house, it's about where God wants us. He already has that figured out - and He's using the journey to teach us a whole lot along the way.

We still have to get through escrow. And, in this market, escrow is not pretty. There are so many possible hiccups and hang-ups that could slow us down or blow us completely out of the water. So, some might say that it is too early to celebrate, because we are not in the door yet.

But here's what I've decided: I am not going to wait until I am putting dishes in the cupboards to recognize and rejoice in the miracle God has given us. He got us HERE! He aligned the minds of the decision makers and allowed our offer to get accepted! We made 24 offers. TWENTY-FOUR. It is a miracle to be going to our home inspection today!

The beautiful thing is, it is so amazingly easy to see that God is the one driving this deal. On the perfect house, with a simple offer (just what they were asking...we couldn't afford any more), we got our yes. Like it was the most natural, easiest thing in the world.

So I am rejoicing in the moment. We are here. We are in escrow. And it is a gift from God. I will praise Him now, and I will praise Him if He takes us down a different road. But I don't want to miss this moment, and I don't want to forget how it feels to be completely in awe of the way He works. Trust means you can rejoice...because you know, however things unfold, He is in complete control.

To Ezekiel, on your 3rd birthday

Happy Birthday Bear! Today you turn 3. And I love the opportunity to celebrate all that I love about you. You are a gem of a son, Ezekiel. Your dad and I often say that God gave us his very best when he gave us you. There is something so beautiful about you that goes much deeper than your content smile, velvety soft skin, and big brown eyes. It shines through in your laugh that comes easily and often and from the tips of your toes. It radiates from your zest for life and approach to every new adventure with arms wide open. It's oh-so-clear in the way that you love with all your heart. And maybe that it what makes you so lovable in return.

The way you are with your sister gives me a glimpse of the kind and tender heart God's given you. The other day I saw you brush her face with your hand and say "Baby, you're so pretty." What a wonderful big brother you are, bear, and I pray you only continue to protect and care for your "baby". She is your best friend - the one friend that will always be with you.

You are only three but I see your heart softening toward Jesus. You know He is God, and you know He loves you. Your dad and I pray every day that you will grow to know and love Him too. I am thrilled that you love to go to church - that you ask to go to church - and that you want to learn about God. We pray that you will one day soon recognize your need for Jesus as Lord and Savior in your life. Because we all so desperately need him, son.

You know what's neat? I think that God has given you a strong sense of loyalty, just like He's given your mom and dad. It's a character trait we highly value as a family, and it is already evident in your young life. I will never forget our trip up to Lake Almanor this past summer. We started out our marathon car trip by telling you that you'd see cousins at the end of our journey. When you'd get fussy or restless, Aunt Rebekah and I would hear you quietly remind yourself "I see cousins!" and you'd settle back down. Every hour or so, you'd ask for reassurance "Mom, I see cousins?" "Yes, bear, you'll see cousins in a few hours." Your love and loyalty toward your cousins is so strong, you'd do anything just to get to them. These are the makings of a great friend, son, and I'm already praying that God continues to bless you with life long friendships.

If there is one area where dad and I struggle as your parents, bear, it's by over-loving you. We want you to know you are loved deeply and unconditionally. And that you and your sister are God's greatest gifts to us. But, even as I write that, I demonstrate my tendency to over-love you. Because you are the gift, but Jesus is the gift-giver. He alone is the one we worship and adore - and every good and perfect gift comes from Him. So we thank God for you, Ezekiel, and ask Him for the strength to hold you loosely. For the time that He's entrusted you to us, may we mold and shape you to reflect His glory.

Happy Birthday, Ezekiel Sokyra Plumb. Three years ago I become a mother - and you forever changed my life. I love you!

Capturing the Cuteness...

This blog is all about capturing memories for our family. And I so want to remember all the cute and funny things our kids say. So here are a few more stories to share with our friends!

• We took the kids to see a fireworks show on the 4th of July. It was Ezekiel's first time, and he loved it. A couple days later, one of the construction workers at mom and dad's sneezed REALLY loudly. Ezekiel looks up from playing and says "Hey! Was that a firework?!"

• Our son is officially all boy. He found a bug at church and carried it around in a cup for a while. Of course, that little bug got tired of captivity and found a way to escape. Ezekiel was very sad to lose his friend, but later that afternoon we were playing in the pool when he saw another bug floating around. "Oh, there you are!" he said, and happily reclaimed "his" bug!

• Last Wednesday we took the kids and Elway to run around on the church lawn and play on the playground. The church was locked, but Ezekiel had to give it a try anyway. We thought it was so cute - and touching - when Ezekiel knocked on the door and yelled "I want to learn about God!!"

• Yesterday we were the only ones at the park for some time while the kids played. Finally, another little girl and her daddy showed up. Ezekiel saw them coming a long way off from his swing and yelled "Hey wook! Friends are here!" I love that about my son, he wants to be a friend to everyone. (PS: Bekah Jane kept calling the little girl "Abby")

Sometimes, you don't always get what you want.

I stole the title of this post from my 8-year-old self. This was sort of a mantra in my family as I was growing up--a silly thing us kids would say when things didn't go our way. Well, I've been thinking about it a lot lately because it sure is true. Sometimes things just don't happen the way you planned--or even the way you hoped. And that is definitely the case as we continue our adventure in house hunting. Last week, we made our tenth offer on the tenth house we imagined calling "home." It's a weird thing because after, say, offer number 4 or 5, you want to become calloused to making offers (since we do it more often than we shower some weeks), but you have to take each one just as seriously as the first. So every time we go through the process: plotting where we'd put our furniture, listing out the projects, talking through the pros and cons, seeking advice from my parents, and talking to our friends about the possibility that perhaps this could be the one. And every time it's ended in disappointment. A roller coaster, yes. A process MUCH longer, harder, and more exhausting than we ever imagined, yes. A reminder that God is in control of every detail of our lives; a challenge to trust Him completely and not rely on our own understanding--YES. But here's the thing: I really, truly believe that it is in the hardships that we can best glorify him. In our attitudes, in our perspectives, and in our gratitude when he answers long-awaited prayer. Yes, sometimes we don't always get what we want, but that is what gives us an even deeper appreciation for all of the lavish blessings God does choose to pour upon us.

So, in the spirit of thankfulness, here are some things I am grateful for during this season:

• My kids are thriving at grandma and papa's house. They are forming bonds that will last their entire lifetime.
• My parents are so, so gracious to us. We have been here 5 months. They continue to make us feel welcome, to consider our needs ahead of their own often times, and to pray with us as we search for our next house. It's sort of hard to imagine, but I really think they mostly enjoy having us here (even though we have basically taken over their house!).
• Even though my parents' place is under construction, it is really like staying at a resort. We are LOVING the pool, the playground, and all the room to play outside. It's really not such a bad way to spend your day.
• Back to the construction: Miraculously, my daughter can sleep through pounding nails, sledgehammers, and table saws. It's amazing. There are moments when I'm frustrated by the noise or mess, but then I remember that I had plenty of moments of frustration with my old home, and it wasn't even under construction!
• Kevan and I are doing GREAT as a couple through this time of transition. Lots of good things happening there, and I am so thankful for that.
• Kevan is loving the opportunity to glean from my dad. Dinner together every night, late night discussions, Saturday work days...plenty of opportunities to talk and learn.
• And I love hanging with my mom so much. It's like living with your best friend. I know I will miss this A LOT when we are (finally!) gone.

Wow, I am just getting started! But that's good for now. I write this so that, in my moments of discouragement, I am reminded of all that GOOD that is taking place during this season of unknowns.

I leave you with some long overdue pictures of us moving out. I miss you, Southgate house. But, as we moved out our furniture and toys and pictures, I realized that you are just a shell. A cute shell, but no longer our home. We will find a new place and fill it with memories and all the things that make up "us"....and it will be home.

Kevan packing up our "PODS"

The kids hanging on the porch while we packed boxes

One last chance to play in the yard (Vic is on his way to pick up the keys!)


Saying goodbye to their room

Silly family pictures (I love you, french doors)

Bye-bye to our first home! You were so good to us...we look forward to seeing where we will plant our roots next!

Bad Mom/Stupid Dog.

Today Ezekiel got bit by a dog. Yes, it was horrible. And thankfully he is doing just fine. But I am seriously ill thinking about what could have been.

Last night, we found a great house in Placentia that we decided to put an offer on. This morning, I went back to talk with the current owners some more and show the house to Heidi. As we walked into the backyard (without the owners), Heidi asked me several times "Are you sure the dogs are ok?" and I reassured her that the owners told us they were friendly. The kids had even played with them yesterday and they were fine. But I should have listened to Heidi's concern because, sure enough, as Ezekiel was petting one of the little dogs it snarled at him and bit him right on the face. AWFUL. My poor little boy had blood gushing from his eye, forehead and nose. I almost kicked that stupid dog clear across the yard (love dogs, just not the ones that bite my kid!).

Thankfully, he didn't need stitches and - once we got the initial mess cleaned up - it really doesn't look as bad as I thought. He's going to have a nice shiner tomorrow and a scar on his eyelid but that's nothing compared to what could have happened. I say all this for the benefit of my fellow moms out there: BEWARE OF DOGS. Seriously, please be so careful around dogs you don't know, regardless of what the owners say. I don't even want to imagine how much worse this could have been if the dog was bigger or if it had been any closer to Ezekiel's eye.

Ezekiel has been a champ throughout this ordeal, though. When we got in the car he said "Mom, the dog pushed Bear." I thought it was cute that he used his nickname to refer to himself and that he was concerned about falling over rather than the bite at first. Then, later on, he turned to Bekah Jane with a look of concern and said "You okay, baby, you okay?" as if he just realized he was hurt and hadn't checked on his sister yet. And Bekah Jane kept pointing to her eye as if she was sympathizing with her brother.

Thank you God for keeping my son safe even when my own supervision fails.

Present For Daddy

For Father's Day this year, I made Kevan another t-shirt with a picture of the kids. I did this last year and it was such a hit I couldn't resist doing it again. It is the cheesiest, coolest present! =) The kids dressed in Orange and Blue for daddy and we had a little photo shoot on the swing. I love their expressions in these pictures!

Father's Day Preview...

My eyes are heavy from a full day with the kids, and I gotta get some sleep before VBS starts in the morning. But in case things are crazy again tomorrow or something comes up and I don't ever write all that I want to about Father's day, I want to at least say this before I hit the hay:

I LOVE MY HUSBAND. A LOT.

I really, truly believe he is the best husband and father ever. But I suppose many a wife feels that way, so I will just say he is the best for ME. I love our past (for all it's ups and downs), I love where we are RIGHT NOW - perfecting the dance of raising our kids together, learning and growing together, and marveling at how God is refining my husband to lead our family - and I am looking forward to our future with excitement and anticipation. What will God do? What opportunities will He give us to glorify Him as a family? I love my husband and I love our life together. It is all blessing. And it is good.

To be continued (I hope!)...

Bit about Bekah Jane

As of last week, my sweet little girl has taken to saying "Hold you?" just like her big brother. It's the first two words she's put together and I think it is the cutest thing, especially since she learned it from Ezekiel. She throws her arms around my neck and squeezes super tight when I pick her up. I can't believe how fast this pretty little girl is growing. She is a complicated girl already, too! Most of the time I think she is the easiest child ever (she is almost always happy, she sleeps great, she entertains herself really well, she is super social and adapts well in most situations...yeah, the bragging list is pretty long!), but some days I just cannot believe the attitude in this little one! She can be so sassy and smug and downright conniving. For instance, she will steal E's froggy and prance around the house likes it's the greatest prize, knowing that is makes him so angry. She's not even 18 months - how can she be so mean? So, my motto lately is "Don't be deceived by her cuteness!"

We absolutely ADORE this baby girl. I am kind of obsessed with her hair lately too. I love how long it's getting! She can do pony tails now and, yeah, it's basically the cutest thing ever. She is a joy and a blessing to me - every day I look at her and wonder how I could be so blessed to call her "daughter."

PS: The past three days she has slept in until 10 o'clock. Is that even sleeping in or did she just go straight into her nap?! Should I be worried? I think she is growing? That is 14 straight hours of sleep!